Jude's Birth Story
I never intended to share Jude’s birth story publicly on the internet. I began writing this for myself as a way to remember and honor how our little boy came into the world. It’s incredible how quickly we forget the details. But after several friends (mostly women, of course) asked for the story, I decided to open it up for everyone (censoring out some of the “gory” details).
The “birth plan”…
Several people advised me to not create a “birth plan”, because when the moment comes there’s truly so much out of our control.
However, creating a birth plan made me feel empowered. There are so many possible ways a birth can go. I’m glad Shay and I spent the time researching and learning about our options. Our doula, Jessica, also helped tremendously with understanding certain terms and hospital protocols - giving us the knowledge and tools to advocate for ourselves.
While everything didn’t go the way I “planned”, I’m still glad I had some kind of plan in place. I did my best to hold it open-handedly, always praying for Jude’s birth to be in God’s hands. I trusted His will, but also knew God trusted me to make wise decisions for myself and for the health of our boy. Educating ourselves along the way was a huge part of that.
I won’t share our entire birth plan, but my top 3 desires were:
Vaginal delivery
Unmedicated birth
No induction
If you’re reading this and are thinking your preferences are the opposite of mine - that’s OK. Everyone is different and there’s no wrong way to birth a child. Childbirth is a miracle, no matter what your story is!
High blood pressure on NYE…
My due date for this little guy was December 29th.
On December 30th, at my 40 week prenatal appointment, I had a few high blood pressure readings. I was sent to the hospital for monitoring, and after a couple of hours my blood pressure went back down to normal. The midwife on call at the hospital that day (Kameron - who would deliver our baby boy a couple of days later), asked if I wanted to be induced and get the ball rolling. I said no, not unless it was medically necessary. Deep down, I didn’t feel like he was quite ready to come out that day.
My midwife sent me home with instructions for monitoring my own blood pressure twice a day. If it were to peak above a certain threshold, I was told to call in for instructions on what to do next.
The evening of December 30th and morning of December 31st, my blood pressure was normal. On December 31st, I woke up at 6:30 am (which is normal for me), but by 8 am I felt really tired. I took a nap from 8 am - 10 am and I thought to myself, “This is weird. Is my body preparing me for a long night of laboring?”
On top of that, we had severe weather forecasted for NYE and NYD in Nashville - some heavy rain and a snow storm was brewing. My doula, Jessica, texted me that morning and said:
“You feeling good? My prediction is that the rain and temperature drop this weekend is going to tell baby boy it’s time to come if he’s ready!”
I then told her about my nap and instincts to lay low on the couch all day. I sensed my body needed rest, and she told me to lean into it.
Shay and I made NYE dinner together (Butter Chicken in the instant pot - in case anyone was wondering). I took my blood pressure at 6:30 pm and it was just over the threshold of concern. I waited an hour and took it again, and it was even higher. Because I was doubting my ability to properly use the $30 blood pressure monitor from Publix, I took Shay’s reading - his was normal.
At that point, I could tell I had a slight headache and knew my high blood pressure readings were probably correct. I called my midwife's office. They told me to go to the hospital for monitoring (again) and bring our hospital bag just in case.
We left the house an hour later, and by 9:30 pm I was being monitored in triage (same protocol as the day before). They took three readings 20 minutes apart - all of which were high and a cause for concern.
At this point my midwife highly recommended an induction. Shay and I were both really nervous about it. Before agreeing to it, we asked for a cervical check to see if I was dilated at all. My midwife checked me around 10:30 pm. I was 3 cm dilated and 80% effaced. This helped assure me that our baby boy was starting to come on his own, but just needed a little nudge.
While I was nervous about an induction (and technically could have declined one), I knew the risks of leaving the hospital with high blood pressure were higher than the risks of an induction. Ultimately, for the safety of the baby and for me, it made sense to kick-start labor and encourage our baby boy to come out.
The birthing timeline…
Things escalated quickly, and the best way to document this is with a timestamp of events.
11:59 PM
We were admitted to our labor room right as the clock changed to midnight, and we entered into the year 2022. New Year’s Eve 2021 will probably go down in history as one of the strangest.
1:30 AM
They started my induction with a low dose of Pitocin (level 2). While my contractions were minor I was able to fade in and out of sleep. In talking with my doula, Jessica, I was pretty sure I’d be in early labor for a while. I told her to sleep and come to the hospital later in the morning. We both said prayers that my body would just need a little bit of Pitocin, and this boy would come quickly.
4:30 AM
My Pitocin level was at a 6. I was told my midwife would do another cervical check at 6 am.
5:30 AM
My Pitocin level was at a 7, and I was really starting to feel the contractions. I was getting a little nervous, because Pitocin can make contractions more intense than natural labor contractions. Without an epidural, I was anxious for Jessica to arrive so we could start working on natural pain management.
6:00 AM
My midwife checked me. I was 4 cm dilated and 90% effaced. At this point I was feeling a little discouraged and was convinced I wasn’t having this baby until the evening. I was mentally preparing to labor much longer. I started heavily praying for the strength to get through it.
6:30 AM
Jessica was on her way, but the pain was getting so intense I needed to do something about it. I decided to bounce on a birthing ball, which only lasted a few minutes. Our baby boy didn’t seem to like that method of pain management, because his heart rate dropped. Soon people were in the room, getting me on the bed and flipping me from side to side to get his heart rate back to normal. This was very unpleasant, but we recovered quickly.
6:50 AM
Jessica walked into the room with a big smile and her bag of tricks. I can’t remember the last time I was that happy to see someone!
7:00 AM
Still convinced we had so much time to labor, I let Shay leave to get a coffee while Jessica and I started on some pain management. We walked around the room. I used a peanut ball on the bed. Jessica put pressure on my lower back as contractions came on.
7:30 AM
My water broke. Shay walked in the room with his latte and could tell the environment had changed drastically in 30 minutes. I looked at him like he’d been gone for hours. He quickly stepped in to help and let me put all of my body weight on him as we somewhat slow-danced in the room. My contractions became more intense and I labored in several positions: standing, laying down, and sitting on the toilet (which was most comfortable). All the while, my Spotify Birth Playlist was vibing in the background.
8:15 AM
My contractions were happening on top of one another (the ones triggered by Pitocin and natural ones). They lowered my Pitocin level to the lowest amount (back to a 2) - at which point my body had more or less naturally taken over. I laid on the bed on my left side with a peanut ball. Jessica physically saw the baby drop and noticed my breathing patterns change.
8:30 AM
My contractions were so strong and painful at this point, the only place I felt comfortable was laboring on the toilet. It felt like the baby was going to come out of my butt (I hear this is a common feeling). Sitting in this position made the most sense while giving me the most relief. Jessica stood in front of me. While I leaned into her, she rubbed my upper back. Shay was right next to us offering encouragement.
8:45 AM
My midwife, Kameron, came into the room and saw me on the toilet. She could tell I was ready to push. I moved to the bed. She checked me and I was at a +2 fetal station. I was asked if I wanted to give birth laying down - I said no. We decided I would get on my elbows and knees with Shay holding my hands. This was such a natural and comfortable birthing position for me.
9:00 AM
I started to push. One of the nurses tried to coach me through the breathing / pushing rhythms based on what the monitors were showing, but it didn’t feel right. I instinctively knew how I needed to breathe, when to push, and when to rest. Once the baby started crowning, Kameron asked if I wanted to feel the baby’s head. I started to cry and for some reason I said, “I can’t, I’m too scared.” Looking back on that moment, I think I was afraid to break my concentration . . . but ultimately I did reach through and touch his little head. The whole time I was pushing, I could hear worship music in the background. As our baby boy was crowning, Jessica prayed over us.
9:24 AM
Our baby boy came earth-side. Kameron passed him through my legs like a football - which was the craziest moment of my entire life. I started sobbing. I couldn’t believe I was holding our baby, who just moments ago was inside me. The delivery team carefully got me onto my back and laid our boy on my chest. His umbilical cord pulsed for 6 minutes before Shay cut it. At that moment I looked at the clock and thought to myself, “Is it really only 9:30 in the morning?! How did that happen so fast?!”
Jessica later told me my midwife, Kameron, said she hadn’t seen such a controlled birth from an unmedicated mom in a long time! This was a huge compliment, but ultimately I cannot take all of the credit. I attribute this to A LOT of prayer and a lot of support from Jessica and Shay. I truly couldn’t have done it without them and without God giving me the strength to power through.
Allow me to introduce you to…
What’s in a name?…
Surprisingly, naming this child was one of the easiest decisions Shay and I have ever made.
On our 10 year anniversary, when I was only 5 weeks pregnant, we spent some time over dinner going through a list of names. Jude was in my top 10. Once I shared it with Shay, it seemed to click. It's the one name we kept circling back to. It seems we've been calling him "Baby J" since before he had ears to hear.
Jude - meaning “praised”
Saint: Jude is the patron saint of desperate causes. He symbolizes hope in times of great need, choosing faith when all seems lost. He is a testament to standing firm in religious truth in the face of an ever uncertain and challenging world.
Apostle: One of Jesus' 12 closest followers (also known as Thaddeus). He spent three years with Jesus, witnessing his miracles and teachings.
Author: Wrote the Epistle of Jude in the New Testament
Brother: One of Jesus' half brothers (Matthew 13:55; Mark 6:3)
I hope you enjoyed reading about Jude’s birth story! When I was pregnant, I loved listening to and reading about other people’s birth stories. It’s interesting to me how different every mom is, how everyone’s preferences are unique, and how special each story is. In the end, no matter how it all shakes out, the end result is more or less the same… a new mom holding her child for the very first time.